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Kathy’s Column for April 8, 2010

SoVaNow.com / April 06, 2010
HOPE Y'ALL HAD A WONDERFUL AND BLESSED EASTER... and, even though I'm beginning this before the holiday I'm quite sure I can say with certainty that mine was perfect. Why? Because I spent it in Charleston, S.C. with all my grandchildren and therein lies my 100 percent certainty. I also know that I'll most likely be saying y'all for awhile as that is the normal pattern of speech heard everywhere in the Holy City, a.k.a. Charleston. Habits, as usual, take awhile to break or to implement and most likely this will happen to me as I go "home" to one of the most favorite places in which I've ever lived. A dear friend here gifted me with the March Edition of "Southern Living" before I left, because Charleston played a major role in numerous articles last month. I truly enjoy learning more about places I've been and much of what I read brought back numerous lovely memories also. If you haven't ever been you must put this destination on your list of things to do. I promise you will not be disappointed, and if you need a guide, let me see what I can do. After all any excuse to go back is okay with me.

WHAT KEY INGREDIENTS DO YOU THINK IT TAKES TO ENSURE A LASTING FRIENDSHIP ... A poem I just read said it was the following: loyalty, understanding, trust and sharing. Rather a short list, but I feel it truly does encompass all the aspects needed to feel loved and special when it comes to our friendships. What more is there when discussing the beauty of friendship. It went on to say that the levels of expression we need to communicate this to one another include conveying appreciation and gratitude, evoking special memories and the bringing of smiles. A friend is there with open arms, a caring heart and an overall spirit that always cares. A special thanks to my dear friends who epitomize these attributes. During this month of April many of those I hold dear celebrate their birthdays, and I am most grateful to be here to help them do just that also. Once friendship takes root in our souls it grows into a closeness and understanding that then becomes a magnificent treasure throughout our lives. "To be true friends, you must be sure of one another."-Leo Tolstoy. "Friends are not only together when they are side by side, even one who is far away ... is still in our thoughts."-Ludwig van Beethoven.

COULD FRIENDSHIP ALSO BE OUR KEY TO WORLD PEACE ... well according to Bertha Conde, it is. She said and I quote, "The peace of the world will in the end depend upon our capacity for friendship and willingness to use it." In this give and take world, we all owe it to ourselves and others to do what we can to make our world a better place in which to live and have our being and thus insure the generations to come of treasured memories in their lives too.

IN LAST WEEK'S COLUMN I TALKED ABOUT POLITICIANS AND MICROPHONES THAT WERE STILL ON ... and capturing what was being said when individuals shared more of their true thoughts. They were recorded unbeknownst to the guilty parties and have continued to create an uproar. The young man in California that I mentioned has now begun a nationwide campaign to stop this awful habit with consequences that hopefully will finally bring an end to some of our current practices which have become the norm regarding swearing. I was reading an article about dementia and Alzheimer's disease the other day in which it was stated that the language of swearing comes from a section of the brain which is not the center of our everyday speech. Some in the article believe that swearing is a survival mechanism stored in the primordial part of the brain, an embedded rage circuit that when activated can unnerve an attacker of any sort. It went on to say that way back when our ancestors learned this from early mammals who screamed and screeched a warning cry that came from deep within the brain to alert them to harm giving them time to run. I've known Alzheimer patients who have said things they never said before they were afflicted with this dreaded disease and this manner of thinking would clear up the question as to why now does a person start using these words when before they never did. Could that be what happens with this horrid disease attacks and does this reaction become a part of a fight or flight reaction to threatening or disturbing situations? I tend to believe that it does. I don't think our current population of political gaffes can be attributed to this disease, however, and I feel very strongly that we as individuals and as a nation need to change our extremely bad and harmful habits if we want future generations to act in a manner that befits a good and kind person. MARK TWAIN, EVEN THOUGH I DON'T AGREE WITH A NUMBER OF THINGS HE HAS BEEN QUOTED AS SAYING... he still remains a definite author to admire. "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." That quote is truly one of his most endearing and best.

I WONDER IF ANY OF MY READERS ... saw the "Dateline" Sunday program a couple of weeks ago where a small town in Wisconsin came together and helped a needy single mother and her triplets by rebuilding her home and giving her much needed assistance. The name of the small town was Grafton, and it just so happened it was also the very town where I began my married life over forty years ago. I, too, recall many lovely memories of dear and kind folks who helped me in my new life as a married person. I don't recall ever meeting any of the wonderful people who worked hard to make this particular dream come true, but when they panned the area, there were so many happy memories attached that I almost cried. There were also many familiar names mentioned. Who knows they could be children of long lost friends from a time long ago that will remain cherished memories forever. I remember, for example standing on that very bridge pictured numerous times, on my very first date with my now husband and him promising me the world. There may be a few of those things I haven't yet experienced, but on the whole most of my dreams have come true, and I'm happy to say they began in Grafton WI. I called everyone I could think of up there to tell them to watch the program. Of course some already had planned to do just that as the "News Graphic," their local paper, and a local radio station had done their part in getting the word out. It's one of those nostalgic things that mean so much in this time of world unrest, you know a kinder and gentler kind of thing that we find more and more difficult to find in today's world.

THERE HAS BEEN A LOT OF BUZZ OUT THERE AS TO THE MOVIE ... entitled "Babies" that will be coming out in May for a Mother's Day debut. I am so looking forward to it as it celebrates babies and in this particular instance four wonderful little beings from all corners of the earth. We in the United States are being represented by a baby in San Francisco. I'm wondering why someone didn't call me to ask if I knew of any special baby they might follow for a year in the making of their movie. After all I have grandchildren that are very amazing. Oh that's right, so does everyone else. Guess we'll just have to imagine how our own would have behaved if they were one of the stars. "If you have zest and enthusiasm... you attract zest and enthusiasm. Life does give back in kind."- anonymous.

AS I MENTIONED AT THE BEGINNING OF THIS WEEK'S MISSIVE ... I spent the holiday in South Carolina, and it was for the most part fantastic, however, it is just as beautiful here in Virginia as there this spring. I can't believe it, but on almost our entire trip home we were able to have the top down on the car and therefore able to enjoy the lovely warm, almost hot at times, temperatures. When the sun went down only a few miles from home, we had to pull over and enclose ourselves once again in a winter mode car (a.k.a. top up and windows closed). But, even that was okay as spring and summer are finally here, and y'all I couldn't be happier. I don't even mind my spring allergies as much as I usually do because I am completely sick of snow and icy weather. Enjoy nature's beauty, get out and smell the flowers and feel the sun kissing your face and remember what it is like not to have to bundle up in numerous layers of clothing.

GOD BLESS AS ONLY HE CAN... and pass it on.


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